Wednesday, September 14, 2011

5 weeks 4 days

Today I bought an E.P.T from the grocery store just as sort of a reassurance to myself. I already had three very positive Dollar Tree tests, but I needed something a little more concrete. Lately, since I am such a pro at "peeing on a stick" that its pretty much a hobby of mine (I'm only slightly kidding here), I have determined that it's much easier to pee in a cup and dip the stick rather than peeing all over myself trying to pee on the stick. That was a lot of the word "pee" in one sentence. I'm sorry.

I came home from my classes today complete with lunch for my sweet husband who is on vacation this week. In my lunch bag though was the EPT. I swear I sneak them around like contraband, because my husband rolls his eyes at me. He thinks one positive is enough to stop obsessing. And it should be! But for me, it just is not.

I did the whole pee in a cup, dip the stick and set it flat on the counter thing. As the dye moved across the window, I could already see a positive result forming. Before the 3 minute mark was even up, the vertical (positive) part of the plus sign was darker than the horizontal (control) line. I did have this sense of just knowing but it felt damn good to be reassured by that perfect pink plus sign.

I walked out of the bathroom proudly and waved my pee stick in husbands face. He is hilariously grossed out by them, even though I've explained time and again that the only part that has my urine on it is covered by a cap. He was confused on how to read this particular test. Every other test he's seen so far has been two pink vertical lines. Once he figured it out however, he looked up at me, raised his eyebrows and said, "yep. You're knocked up alright." :)

As I said in my earlier post, some of this first time pregnancy romance has lost its novelty because of how our true first pregnancy ended. We are both cautiously optimistic but not much more than that. In all honesty, I am so nervous to schedule my first appointment or ultrasound until 8 weeks when I know for.sure that there will be something to see. I just don't think I can bear going in for a 6 week ultrasound and being told they see no heartbeat or something.

Of course, there is the distinct possibility that I am farther along than I think I am. After all, I am not sure if the two days of bleeding I experienced in August actually were a period or not. Right after I stopped bleeding I took a pregnancy test and it was undeniably negative so that makes me feel better that my HCG levels had dropped off. Hopefully, with this unexpected pregnancy so soon after a complication, everything will be A-okay.

I am definitely feeling so much rounder in the belly already, although I am positive that is because of bloating. I actually found a tiny little stretch mark on the back of my hip just above my know that sexy muffin top area? I don't know if it's always been there or if it is my first stretch mark. If I'm already getting them at 5 weeks, I am terrified to see what happens next. My boobs are still ungodly huge. Its actually kind of grossing me out. I only just recently in life have put on enough weight to be classed "normal weight" rather than on the verge of underweight so boobs were a new novelty to me anyway. These huge crazy things are just shocking. And they flipping HURT. I pretty much sleep in a bra anyways but I can barely move at night.

I bought these otc prenatals that I actually am doing fine with. I thought I would struggle with swallowing them because they are gigantic. I made the mistake of taking them in the morning for a couple of days and felt like absolute crap for a couple hours afterward. Now, I just take them right after dinner with a big glass of water and seem to be fine.

The pregnancy symptom driving me the most insane would be the peeing every flipping five minutes. And this is totally gross, but a few days ago I had something happen to me in the bathroom that had me frantically searching Dr. Google for a good twenty minutes. Thankfully every single thing I read confirmed it: it is a definite sign of pregnancy and nothing else. When I went pee, I wiped several times and each time, big stretchy globs of yellow snot-like cervical mucus came off on the toilet paper. (Super yuck, I know.) It literally looked like what snot looks like when you have a bad sinus infection. According to lots of prego-sites, this is a sure fire sign of building up the mucus plug...which is a very good thing.

Other than that, I have just been extremely tired and craving odd things at odd times. For instance, guacamole is my new favorite thing at any and all moments. And yesterday I just HAD to have eggs benedict even though I know hollendaise is a no-no. So strange. While I absolutely love Coke, I have switched to caffeine free so that I am not inadvertently doing anything bad for me or the baby. I actually have been craving water. Like chugging it. And very very strange for me (normally a huge ice water fan - the colder and more packed full of ice the better) I have just been wanting to drink it from the tap...sorta tepid. Not cold but not warm. Weird.

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