Samuel Joshua: Our Little Miracle

It has taken me this long to sit down and write this partially because I have been giving every ounce of my time to this little miracle beside me, and mostly because I was scared to death to admit just how lucky we got.

 I'd been feeling menstrual-type cramping pretty constantly for about 4 days. My doctor assured me that it was normal and that they were in fact "practice contractions" at my appointment on Tuesday, April 22nd. I jokingly told her that day that I'd see her next week if I was still pregnant...little did I actually know...

On Saturday, April 28th, I got up and felt the same annoying cramping but went about my day. I went to a little league baseball game for a boy I used to watch and then went to Wal-Mart with my mom while Josh was at work. As we were walking around, my cramps turned really strong. I was a little scared and taken aback by the severity of the pain. My mom laughed at me and said, "maybe this is it?"

On the drive home, I noticed that there were definite peaks and lulls to the pains but that they were never completely going away before starting again. I had out the contraction timer on my phone, but I was having trouble timing them because there were no definite starts and stops. We got to my mom's and I got a big glass of water and put my feet up. The pains kept coming, one on top of the other. I sent Josh a text just as a heads up and then went into the bathroom. The start of my scary journey really begins there. When I wiped, there was bright red blood. I know that sometimes at the beginning of labor, there can be spotting, but this was a lot of blood...and it was coming from my vagina. The pains still had not stopped and the blood sent me over the edge. I asked my mom to call Josh to come get me while I called the on-call number for my gynecologist's office.

The on call receptionist answered and told me that of the five doctors in my practice, not one was on call that weekend but that they had a substitute doctor, Dr. Varma, covering their patients. I was frustrated but asked him to have her give me a call. She called back within a couple of minutes and I told her about my symptoms: fast, sudden, constant contractions  bright red blood. She laughed and told me spotting was normal at the beginning of labor, but that since I was only 38 weeks that I should at least come get checked out. She told me to eat something on the way, just in case it was real labor.

Josh showed up and was adorable and concerned. He tried to sweep me out the door without realizing I didn't even have my shoes on. We laughed about that later. Much, much later. Thankfully, I had packed our hospital bag and the diaper bag the week before so we swung by our apartment and he ran up and grabbed those (in his rush, he didn't grab the "last minute" items I wanted like my phone charger and my make-up).

We got to the hospital and they took me to Labor and Delivery right away, this was around 3:00pm. I was put in a bed and hooked up to a monitor and then left alone for about 20 minutes. Josh and I could just sit there and stare at each other wondering what was going on. My nurse came back in and said, "are you feeling these contractions?" I told her yes and she was astonished because they were literally coming on top of one another with no break in between. She asked how long I'd been laboring at home and I told her I hadn't at all...that the contractions started suddenly and hadn't stopped since. She was baffled by that...because I am a first time mom. She did a cervical check and told me I was at about a 2.5. When she pulled her hand out, it was absolutely covered in dark red blood. I figured she would have said something to me if she was concerned and that maybe my cervix was just extra sensitive or something. Either way, they admitted me, asked me about my birth plan and left me to my own devices to see how fast I would progress.

Right away, I got into the jacuzzi tub. The warm water helped to relieve some of the tension that had built up in my body from fighting the constant contractions for so long (about 4 hours at this point). Josh was so concerned about me but respected my wishes for a drug free delivery and he did everything he could to make me more comfortable. He rubbed my back, held my hand, brought me water and told me he loved me probably a million times.

I got out of the tub for another cervical check about an hour later. I had progressed to a 3.5 in that hour. The nurse was again baffled by how fast I was progressing for a first time mom. She wanted to hook me up to the monitor again to see how baby was tolerating the constant contractions, so I climbed into bed. Just sitting there on my back with the monitors on made the pain from the contractions so much worse. I was always so worried that I wouldn't know a true contraction, but believe me...I knew. This was a deep, lingering intense pain. And I was getting so exhausted. I was only 5 hours into labor and shaking all over. I tried to remember to relax and breathe through them and was doing well. I became kind of a celebrity in the L&D unit...all the nurses were coming in to look at my paper that showed the peaks of the contractions. They were all amazed that they never stopped and also amazed that I had tolerated them for so long.

I was so determined for my med-free birth. At around 9:00 pm, my nurse brought me a birthing ball and some other things to help with the pain. She also made me get back in bed for an hour and told me it was time to give me an IV. She said, "contractions are good, but it is bad for the uterus to get absolutely no break". It took 4 nurses and 7 needle sticks to get an IV in me. That completely broke my focus and I was actually pretty pissed off after that. Two times, a nurse got the needle in and blew out my vein, filling my right wrist with IV fluid. It was swollen and so painful and after the fact my entire arm from wrist to elbow is black and blue.

This is turning so long...suffice it to say, I made it until 5:00am laboring on my own before Dr. Varma finally came to see me. She did a cervical check and I seemed to be stuck at a 4.5-5. She said there was a lip on my cervix that felt like scar tissue and that it was going to hurt, but that she had to push it back otherwise, I would never continue to dilate. Josh held my hand and tears streamed down my face as she manipulated my cervix. She told me my bag of waters was bulging and that by rupturing it, I might get some much needed relief of pressure and more progress could be made. I said okay. She ruptured my water and the feeling of it gushing out was probably the best relief I've ever felt. The entire bed was soaked with amniotic fluid and blood...lots of blood. I mentioned all the blood to her and she casually said, "you might have a little tear or abruption. We'll see!" I got back into the tub and bounced on the birthing ball. The contractions which were already intense became even more so once my water was broken. There still had been no slow down. I was having 2 minute long contractions with maybe a 30 second lull in between. I could barely catch my breath before the next one peaked.

At around 7:00 am, I was checked again and was at a 5.5-6. I was thrilled that I was progressing, but I was so weak and tired from the relentless pain. It was at this point that I started to doubt myself. I had read the books though, I knew the moment I started to believe I could not do it was called transition and that surely meant I was almost on the downward slope. I was hooked up to the monitors again and baby's heartrate was absolutely spiked to a dangerous level. It seems all the stress of the 16 hours of labor with no break was taking its toll on him. At one point, his heart was flickering around 200 bpm then it would drop to around 50 and spike back up. That was scary. And that required the nursing staff to come talk to me.

There had been a shift change and I was left with a no-nonsense, battle axe old lady named Suzanne. She looked me straight in the eye and said, "you are trying to be a hero and you are putting your baby at risk. You are not progressing on your own anymore and you won't because you have pushed yourself too far. We need to give you something to relax otherwise, this could end up being a C-section which none of us want. I'll give you an hour to decide." I was blown away at her rudeness at the time, but she kind of saved me. I was convinced I could do it. I continued bouncing on my labor ball and Josh was rubbing a hole in my back. I was delirious with pain and shaking. I knew my body was fighting the contractions, no matter how hard I tried to relax. At some point, I told Josh, "I cannot physically do this anymore. I feel like I'm going to die." He rushed out at brought in the nurse and I told her to give me something. She offered me an epidural or IV phenergen to take the edge off...and then I vomited all over and became completely lethargic, I think I passed out for a few seconds because I sat blinking like I'd just woken up. At that point, Josh had made the executive decision to get me the epidural and at that point, I couldn't even think straight. I was shaking, almost convulsing, with the pain. I kept vomiting and my vision was black at the sides.

I recall basically nothing about the epidural procedure. I remember leaning over and Josh holding me up and then being laid back down in the bed. I felt warm and tingly everywhere and I could finally, FINALLY after 20 or so hours take a breath and get a hold of myself. I laid there in a trance for awhile as the doctors and nurses worked around me. My heart rate fell drastically from the epidural so they gave me medicine to raise it. That medicine made baby's heart rate spike again so they quickly emptied 4 huge bags of IV fluid into me and came in every 10 minutes to flip me from side to side, trying to calm the baby down. This was turning into my worst nightmare...one medical intervention after another...I was in tears saying, "this isn't what I wanted." over and over but I must admit, the relief from the epidural made me determined with a new goal: no C-Section.

The nurses finally got me and baby under control and told us to get some rest. Josh gratefully fell asleep but my mind was racing. Every time I would close my eyes, I would hear the baby's heart rate do something crazy on the monitor and wake up. I knew my mom was at the hospital so I asked my new nurse (another shift change!) Kellie to bring her in. It was nice to just see my mom's face and hear some words of encouragement. It had been a long night and I needed that mommy boost in order to relax a little more. I progressed extremely fast after the epidural. I went from a 6 at around 7:00am to a fully effaced 10 at 9:00am. Just goes to show that my body was indeed fighting itself and that my contractions were actually doing something once I was relaxed.

The nurse that checked me last was amazed that I had made it to a 10 so quickly. She woke Josh up by saying, "daddy...are you ready? We're going to push!" Josh calmly woke up, got a cup of coffee and came over to ask me if I was ready. I think I was in shock because I just laid there and nodded. Dr. Varma came in, they explained how to breathe/push and off we went. I could not feel anything because of the epidural so it was very hard to focus my pushing to the right place. I asked for a mirror to help me. They brought it in in time to see my baby crowning. For all the moms that say they never want to see it happening like I used to, it was the most beautiful and amazing thing I've ever seen. I reached down and touched the soft black hair covering his head and it gave me inspiration to push. I pushed for 45 minutes...probably 20 pushes in all. We were struggling because I would get his head out and the second I stopped pushing, it would get sucked back in. Dr. Varma said I must have a short cord and that's why he was not making much progress. Josh was so amazing during the whole process, but especially here. He was holding one leg while my nurse held the other and whispering words of encouragement into my ear the whole time. Between each push, he fed me some ice, replaced my oxygen mask and wiped my hair back from my forehead. Even though we always joked that he should *never* look at what was going on down there, he watched the whole thing happen.

The moment I pushed him out I experienced this moment of complete bliss. It sounds so lame but my whole body felt like it was floating as I was staring at the perfect baby they placed on my chest. I was absolutely sobbing and remember saying that he couldn't be mine because he was *too* perfect. The nurses laughed at me. Josh was crying too and I was kissing all over my baby despite all the goo that I was sure would ick me out prior to having him. He started screaming the moment his head was out, so he swallowed quite a bit of blood and mucous and was gaggy. They suctioned him and he kept screaming. I will never forget his eyes. They were wide open and he just locked straight into mine as if to say, "I'm here...I just need you to love me forever."

It was at this point that I heard my doctor say, "oh...my God." I glanced up in time to see her as pale as a sheet and whispering something to one of my nurses. I asked if everything was okay and they said they'd tell me in a moment. The doctor plopped my placenta in a tray and set to work stitching me up (only two tiny stitches inside my perineum and no hemis!) I was so in awe of my new baby I didn't notice the room filling up with people. Countless nurses, the pediatrician, and doctors came in and were all looking at my placenta in its tray off at the side of the room. Dr. Varma finished my stitches, came over to the side of my bed and said some words I will never forget. Her eyes were teary as she said, "you need to thank God that things happened the way they did. You are so lucky. You cherish that baby." She held my hand as she was saying this and it finally started to hit me that something was wrong.

Josh and I looked at each other, both wondering what was going on. He asked her if everything was okay and she said it seemed so but that they would be keeping a close eye on me. She then wheeled over the cart holding my placenta and held it up for us to see. Josh was grossed out at first but then the ick factor was taken over by absolute awe-struck silence. The baby's umbilical cord was attached by a thread to the very end of the placenta, not the middle like it should have been. Apparently this is called a velamentous insertion. It's very rare and a lot of pregnancies do not make it to term because the blood vessels traverse the outside of the cord rather than the inside. Because the blood vessels were on the outside, the pressure from baby and everything else had pinched the cord somewhere inside of me and a HUGE blood clot had formed between the cord and the placenta. It was about the size of a grapefruit. Because of this blood clot, we don't know how much nutrients the baby actually got in the last few weeks. I was losing weight and my belly had not grown between week 36 and 38, so the doctor believes it happened in that time frame. The blood clot was blocking blood flow either way...and if it had ruptured, it could have meant instant hemorrhaging for me and instant death for my sweet boy.

I have tears rolling down my face as I type this because *what are the chances* that all this could have happened and I still got to walk away with my child at the end. Josh sobbed to me in the recovery room that he could have lost his whole world in one second if *anything* had gone differently than it had. My placenta, because of the stress of the clot, had been trying to abrupt itself from my uterus from the beginning of labor...before the baby was even out. That explains the bleeding throughout labor and the constant contractions. I cannot explain the break down I had when I realized that I honestly could have died. I am so blessed. Sam was conceived right after our first miscarriage with no period in between...that alone was a miracle. And then to survive this (It is so rare that it happens in 1.1% of pregnancies. 1.1%...) I am overwhelmed.

I am trying to remind myself that what matters now is not what *could* have happened but that I have a perfect little miracle baby that I am lucky enough to be able to hold and watch breathe. I was watched closely for any signs of hemmorhage and my placenta was sent to pathology to be checked. None of it remained in my uterus so I was cleared to go home as if nothing had ever happened. This whole thing has been crazy, surreal and wonderful in a way. I have never felt closer to my husband or my God...who was watching out for me in the deepest way on that most important day of my life: Samuel's birthday.

For what it's worth, we chose his name for sure after his birth and hearing the scary news because of this Bible verse which we found extra fitting: I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. 1 Samuel 1:27

37 Week Appointment

I had my 37 week appointment today and everything went well! I had a male med student tagging along with my doctor today and that always makes for an entertaining appointment. He was a cute, young guy and seemed *so* nervous! His hands were shaking as he measured my belly...I can't stop thinking how funny it is that he deals with pregnant women all day and he is so nervous about it.

I mentioned my swollen ankles and my "cramps" and he didn't seem too concerned although he asked me if I could time the cramps. I told him no because I really couldn't tell when they started and stopped. He stayed and chatted with me for a moment and then went and got my doctor.

Apparently, I've somehow lost two pounds in the last week...which considering the nausea I've been having lately, I guess that's not that unusual. So now I'm back at 23 pounds gained total. Whatever! My blood pressure was a little higher than normal: 118/83...so I was a little worried about that too. My doctor checked my ankles and feet and said she thought they looked absolutely fine (so even though they look puffy to me, she didn't see an issue). She then did the little knee reflex test and apparently I passed because she said I had no signs of "hypertension"...um...okay?

When she asked me about my "cramps" she said that it could just be stretching or more likely Braxton Hicks/practice contractions. Then they had me lay back and put the doppler on my stomach. Peanut it still head down (yay!) and she says he has indeed dropped a little further into my pelvis which is good. She winked at me and said, "but that doesn't mean you're going to go into labor today!" As she was squirting the ultrasound gel on my belly she asked me if I was feeling crampy, which I was. Then she said, "sweetheart...that's a contraction!" So apparently, I am *that* girl...who has contractions and doesn't know. She said that the uterus is just really active in the last few weeks of pregnancy and that I would definitely know when the contractions were real. She also told me what I thought was the baby pressing out was contractions too! I am just laughing because I had no idea. Baby's heart rate sounded good and I'm still measuring 37 cm which is right on track...no growth from last week but she said that could be because he's dropped down.

It was a quick and simple appointment and next week I'll have my first cervical check. This is all coming up so fast. This is unrelated but after my appointment I ran to the store and some random girl shouted across the entrance at me, "omg! That baby is going to appear any moment!" I just laughed and said, "I hope not" but people are sooooooooo strange!

37 Weeks! FULL TERM!!!

It has been a long road to get to this point...but at the same time, the weeks have flown by. I officially have a "full term" baby in my belly. Of course, I'd like to keep him in there until he is ready to enter the world...but at this point, he is considered developed enough to be perfectly okay. :)

He is heavy. My belly has dropped significantly. I could tell right away because suddenly it was easier to breathe and stand up without grunting. Unfortunately this means the pelvic pressure and constant peeing have gotten worse! When I'm sitting down now, it feels like he is sitting on my lap instead of way up in my ribcage. He is also bigger though, so while the bulk of him is sitting lower in my abdomen, his little feet and butt have taken up permanent residence under my ribs. Ow! His movements are absolutely insane! He is supposed to be running out of room and therefore calming down, but instead he is karate chopping mommy like it's his job. It's really crazy to see my belly contorting in opposite directions because he is big enough he can kick and punch at the same time!

Despite the fact that I drink water like it is going out of style (literally at least 100 oz a day) and that my blood pressure has been great this entire time (last appointment it was 108/72), I have started to get the dreaded third trimester swelling. After taking the dogs on a walk and running some errands in the warm weather today, I had some serious cankles and puffy toes going on. I'll talk to my doctor tomorrow but I'm sure it's just normal at this point.

The other big thing that has been happening this week is the near constant cramping pain I am having low in my abdomen. Since I have never had contractions before, I cannot be sure if these are real or the Braxton Hicks-practice contractions that I've read about. They just feel like more intense than normal menstrual cramps. I cannot really notice when they start and stop so its hard to time them. These started around Thursday and have been nonstop since. My mom's neighbor heard this, saw my dropped belly and rubbed it and told me she gives me a week. We shall see!

Here's my lower than normal torpedo belly at 37 weeks!:

You can see how my belly now slopes downward rather than popping straight out!

Bump Update:

How far along: 37 Weeks, 19 days to go!!! <---ah!

How big is baby: Around 6 pounds and 19 inches!
Weight Gain: At my appointment last week, I had reached exactly 25 pounds gained. That's perfectly on track for this point in my pregnancy and I am happy with that. I knew the weight would come and I'm glad it's come on gradually...I do feel it slowing a little now here towards the end. And I find comfort in the swelling for once because that makes it more obvious that anything extra I do have going on really is water weight/baby at this point. 
Best moment of the week: We spent Sunday out in the sunshine with my mom, grilling and hanging out. My nose and arms got a little sunburned but it was so nice to not only be out of our stuffy apartment for a little while, but also to be able to enjoy the beautiful weather!
Food cravings:  Popsicles. Lime ones. And grape Kool-Aid. :)
Food aversions: Everything that isn't cold, citrusy or frozen. That's quite honestly all I want to eat right now...I'll eat other food, but it is not yummy to me.

Symptoms: Lower abdominal cramping, easier time breathing but more heartburn than ever, swelling!
Movement: Crazy, intense and strong like always.
What I’m looking forward to: The month of May rolling in...then I'll be able to truly say, "I am having a baby this month!" (That is if nothing crazy happens between now and then!)
What I miss:  I don't think I am going to shock anyone here when I say sleeeeeeeeeep! And yes, I know I will never sleep again, thanks for reminding me! 

36 Weeks!

*yawn*

Oh my goodness, I swear I have never felt this amount of exhaustion in my entire LIFE! I swear, I hit 36 weeks and my body literally just started falling apart. I've been uncomfortable up til now at times of course, but something has shifted in the past couple days and I've had more than one moment of being on the brink of tears and saying, "I don't think I can do this anymore!"

In the last few days,I cannot get comfortable EVER. My belly feels like it is about to rip open from pressure and stretching. I think my child is completely out of room in there because every move he makes is soooo painful. I have no idea how he's positioned in there right now but it hurts everywhere. I know he's dropped a little more because the pelvic pain and pressure is unreal. Getting up from the couch, rolling over in bed or even spreading my legs a little too far to cross them or something is absolutely excruciating. Maybe everyone feels overwhelmed at this point in pregnancy, but I can honestly say right now, this baby can come whenever he wants...I'm over this part.

I don't want to sound like I don't know how much of a blessing this is, because I do. And I am so thankful for it. And I would do it again a million times over to get to hold this baby in my arms. I now know that pregnancy is not easy.

Other than the painful body going on, it has been a great week. I finished my last day of work on Wednesday, and despite some tears about the changes that life is going to take, I know it was the right decision. I cannot wait to actually have a reason to stay home.

Josh and I had the opportunity on Saturday to take Peanut to his "first" Major League Baseball game. With Josh being the baseball guy he is, this child is sure to experience baseball to the fullest throughout his childhood. I'm a romantic, so the idea of being able to tell him one day that his first game was while he was still in his mommy's tummy was too good to pass up.

{happy us, nice and dry...for the time being}

Unfortunately, it was the worst weather ever! It was drizzling/pouring/misting freezing cold rain off and on the entire time. Thankfully, we had amazing seats up in club level, so we were able to go inside the heated lounge area to warm up during the hour long rain delay. The Rockies were down 4-6 in the 7th inning and we were not feeling too hopeful. Slowly though, they built up their momentum through some awesome hitting by a couple rookie players and the score was then 6-7 at the bottom of the 9th with the Rockies up to bat.

{Pulling out the tarps for the rain delay, you can see how empty the stadium was!}

It was almost out of a movie, the rain started coming down in absolute sheets...we had a guy on first with 2 outs and Todd Helton (Josh's hero!) was up to bat. We were probably only there with about 400 people at that point...all the smart ones had left already! Everyone that was still there was on their feet and screaming...and with a full count, Todd Helton hit a 2 run, walk-off home run that stayed fair by inches. I forgot I was pregnant for a second and was jumping and screaming all over like a maniac. Josh actually fell to his knees in the aisle screaming. It was hilarious, exhilarating and such a perfect story to be able to tell our little boy someday. [Josh may or may not be incredibly tempted to change our son's potential name to Todd at this point]

{Sad us, wet and cold...but right before the amazing moment!}

Annnnnnnnnyway. Here's my 36 week heavy belly:

Bump Update:

How far along: 36 Weeks, 26 days left to go!

How big is baby: We'll know for sure after our appointment tomorrow, but probably around 17.5 inches and 5.5-6 pounds...and I can feel every ounce of that.
Weight Gain: Again, I'll know for sure after my appointment, but I would be willing to bet I'm lingering around the 25 pound mark right now. It's funny how my attitude has shifted about this weight gain thing. Before, I was so obsessed about every little pound...but now, I just don't care! I have less than a month to go...whatever is going to come will come and there is really nothing I can do to stop it. Bring it on.
Best moment of the week: Of course, the epic ballgame I spoke about above!
Food cravings:  More ice. More lemonade. Oranges. Cold things. Oh, and sweet tarts. My poor mouth was torn up from eating so many of those sour candies one day this week!
Food aversions: Anything that isn't cold...but I did have a hot dog at the ball game and that seemed to go down fine, so maybe that's the exception to my rule!

Symptoms: Pain, pain, pain. Difficulty breathing and moving. Peeing even more than usual. Ya know...good times.
Movement: Still intense, constant and more painful than ever. He's been getting hiccups more and more lately which is odd. I always feel them right around 8:00 pm practically in my right hip. I am going to assume that means this little stinker still has not flipped head down but we shall see...
What I’m looking forward to: My doctor's appointment. Somehow, I haven't been in over 2 weeks. I usually go on Thursdays, but my doctor wants Josh there for the remainder of my appointments (to talk about labor/our concerns/etc) and he has Mondays off so we had to wait! I always love hearing his heartbeat and talking about how he's doing in there!
What I miss:  Not being such a flipping whiner. I hate complaining and I do try to keep it to a minimum...which is partially why I have this blog, to vent. But I would love a day where I feel fantastic for once.

35 Weeks!

Ah! Another crazy, chaotic week down...and now we have exactly a month until Peanut is due to arrive in the world. My doctor says it best, "at this point, whenever he decides to arrive is his "due date"...it's completely up to him." Everyone in the world seems to want to speculate on when this baby is going to make his appearance. A common opinion is that I won't even make it until May...I don't know if that is people's polite way of saying that I'm huge or what, but it's starting to rub me the wrong way (as is everything lately).

Easter weekend was fun. We spent it in beautiful Colorado Springs with my mom's fiance and his family. It was nice to have one last "adult holiday" before this little one arrives. I just got to sit out on the patio outside all day in the beautiful sunshine and I even got some color on my arms. Everyone was drinking adult beverages except me...so I had a moment of jealousy but it was a good day.

On the drive home, we got into a deep conversation about circumcision. This is the first real "parenting decision" that I've been faced with and it has been weighing heavily on my mind lately. We had a good talk about it and it was nice to hear a concrete opinion from Josh on something. That led into a late night conversation about all the "big issues" such as baptism, religion, morals, spanking, discipline, etc. I love that man so much and it is so nice to know that at the end of the day, we stand on the same solid ground as far as most of these issues. What we don't agree on, we can always find a compromise on. We just work that way. I feel so confident going into this parenting experience because I know he is a good man and will be a wonderful father.

Here's my 35 week belly, which is making life more uncomfortable and difficult by the day!

Bump Update:

How far along: 35 Weeks (3 days technically, since I'm writing this on Monday...oops!) 31 days to go!

How big is baby:He's probably reached his full length at around 17-18 inches and if the 1/2 pound a week gain is to be believed, he is probably around 5 or 5.5 pounds right now!
Weight Gain: I haven't stepped on a scale in about 2 weeks but I'm going to guess right around 23 pounds total.
Best moment of the week: Having the parenting talk with Josh and getting all of our baby stuff set up and put away.
Food cravings:  ICE! I need to talk to my doctor about this because craving ice can be a sign of iron deficiency which we already know I have...I've been wanting to do nothing but crunch, crunch, crunch on ice cubes. I've also been loving lime popsicles and frozen lemonade.
Food aversions: Warm food as always...but things have also been tasting funny to me this week. Everyone else says it tastes fine, so it must just be a pregnancy thing (or I've ruined my taste buds with all the frozen and citrusy things!)

Symptoms: Lately, the biggest one has just been exhaustion. I guess that's to be expected after 20 weeks of insomnia. Last night, I slept through the night for the first time in weeks without peeing because I was just so overtired. I slept a good 9 hours and still feel like crawling back into bed. This big belly has been so in my way lately. Picking things up off the floor is just entirely too difficult. And I don't know which way Peanut is turned right now, but I think he's settled in a little lower because the pelvic pain and pressure is ridiculous...yesterday I couldn't put any weight on my tailbone or I'd get a shock of pain. Fun!
Movement: They say that the bigger baby gets, the more decreased their movement is but that is simply not the case with my child. He NEVER stops moving. He wiggles, rolls, kicks, punches and thumps pretty much all day every day.
What I’m looking forward to: My last day of work is this Wednesday! I didn't want to stop working this early, but with how exhausted I've been lately...I can't say that I am really upset about it anymore. It'll be nice to have some free time to really whip our place into gear so that whenever Peanut decides to make his appearance we are not scrambling around trying to clean things up in order to bring him home.
What I miss:  A stretch mark free belly! It finally happened at 35 weeks pregnant, I have two tiny red stretch marks way down low on my belly...I know it's to be expected as my belly is stretched to the max but I really thought I was going to get lucky and have none! Boo!!!

35/35

I'll do my official weekly update on Sunday like always because it's habit...but I just wanted to point out that today is my 35/35 day!

In the world of pregnancy, this is a special day because I am 35 weeks...which officially means that I have 35 days left until my due date! Things are starting to get more and more real around here! Josh and I moved all of our baby shower presents upstairs and last night he assembled our pack n play and rock n play! I am so glad that he is such a handy man because putting things like that together just makes me angry. Once he got everything in place, he stepped back and looked at the crib in our living room for a little bit, then just said, "...weird." :) I think that about sums up how we both feel about the fact that in about a month, we are going to have a child to bring home and put in that crib.

Josh and I have been together for so long...just the two of us and our dog that it is going to be pretty strange to add another member to our little family. Amazing, but strange. If I have any fear about having this baby it is not about labor or anything like that...it's just the fact that I'm going to be bringing a baby home in about 35 days. A baby! It's exciting and terrifying all at once.

In addition to getting the big stuff put together, I laid out all the baby stuff we own last night to do a sort of inventory and see what we have and what we still need. Looking at all the teeny baby socks and pale blue outfits just made me realize not only is this a baby...this is a boy...MY boy! Today I've been doing tiny little loads of tiny little laundry and laughing at myself for lovingly caressing all these tiny clothes and imagining the little person that will be wearing them very shortly.

34 Weeks!

I am a little late posting this because it's been such a chaotic few days! Thankfully, it was a good kind of chaotic though...I am just now getting a chance to sit down and unwind from it all.

After putting my notice in at work, I've spent my last few days training my replacement. It's funny how everything I'm teaching her is so I can leave! It just makes my shifts a little more strenuous than usual...I have such a routine at work that I'm used to so remembering to slow down and let her take the reins is hard for me sometimes. I am also learning that being pregnant depletes my patience stores by a LOT. I've spent most of my working life training new employees in the retail world and I've never been so annoyed. This girl is doing just fine...I just don't have the patience I used to!

My wonderful, amazing, perfect baby shower was on Sunday and I will write a separate post about it because it deserves it, but suffice it to say that it was an awesome day and I am so thankful and blessed to have such a wonderful mother who put it all together. I am also so lucky and loved by many amazing people...I cannot wait til our son sees just how much he is loved already. I got to wear super cute shoes which made me feel pretty for the first time in awhile and Josh, Peanut and I got completely spoiled. It was such a relief to finally have some baby stuff to take home and put away. I think we can have him now!

Today, Josh and I took our gift cards and some gift money and bought the rest of the things we felt like we needed, including our new travel system (stroller, car seat). Josh got right to work putting it together when we got home and after strolling around our apartment with an empty stroller for a few minutes, he stopped and said, "whoa...we have a stroller. This is so REAL now!" It's been real for me for awhile now (hello bouncing basketball belly) but this was the first moment that Josh really paused for a minute and it hit him that we're having a son...SOON!

Here's my 34 week belly all dressed up for my shower on Sunday before I did my hair:

Bump Update:

How far along: 34 weeks! 39 days left and (really scary!) only 19 days left until I am technically full term at 37 weeks!

How big is baby:According to my doctor, he's probably around 4.5 pounds and around 16-17 inches. Based on my belly, I think she's probably right...he's getting so heavy in there and taking up so much room! He's been moving around under my ribs all weekend which is painful, but it makes me hopeful that perhaps he has flipped finally.
Weight Gain: I finally broke the 20 pound barrier at my appointment on Thursday. I was close to that at one point, then somehow dropped a few pounds a couple weeks ago and now I'm back to it! If I gain a pound a week for the rest of the pregnancy, I'll end up around 26 pounds gained which is about as perfect as you can ask for! At this point, I'm no longer freaking out...my doctor told me in these last weeks, half of everything you gain goes directly to baby and the other half is all the increase in blood/fluid volume.
Best moment of the week: My baby shower! I cannot wait to upload all the pictures and share them. My mom did the most amazing job, she should really be a party planner. She is so creative and all the details of my shower were so adorable and perfect.
Food cravings:  Nothing new this week actually. I'm still loving fruity flavored things: laffy taffy and of course lemonade have been my favorites.
Food aversions: Warm food still. I have no desire to actually eat a hot meal. I am all about summery, cool things like sandwiches, pasta salad, salad, raw veggies, etc.

Symptoms: The crotch pain, the rib pain and the insomnia continue. I've also noticed I get so out of breath so easily. This kid is really crowding my lung space!
Movement: The movements this week are as steady as always but getting stronger by the day!
What I’m looking forward to: My next appointment isn't until April 16th (36 weeks) but we'll get to find out then if Peanut has finally flipped himself around. I sincerely hope he has. I really don't want to hear about things like C-sections or baby turning "versions". Keep your fingers crossed that he's figured out how to get locked and loaded in there.
What I miss:  Sleep! Uninterrupted, long sleep. I realize I probably will not sleep through the night for the next few years, I guess I'm just getting my practice in now. 

34 Week Appointment and a Heart Attack

Today was just one of those that I should have stayed in bed. Nothing went right from the very start. I was supposed to have an appointment at 9:30 this morning. I drove all the way to my doctor's office downtown (about 30 minutes away) only to be told my doctor had just been called off to perform an emergency C-Section. Uhm, wha?? Is that not why you people have my phone number??? So you can let me know these things before I drive all the way down there?

Ugh. Anyway, they told me the next available appointment was at 1:30. In my head, I didn't want to drive alllllllll the way back home to turn around and come back so I figured I could kill time down in that part of town. I actually treated myself to an hour long, amazing pedicure. The girl did such a good job, she must have taken pity on the poor pregnant girl who can no longer reach her toes! I got a great ankle/foot/calf massage and she said she was impressed because I have no swelling at all. Must be all that wonder I'm always chugging. With my toes looking all cute and Barbie pink, I decided to see if I could find a cute outfit for my baby shower. I hit up a few stores and bought some super cute shoes that will hopefully work with what I have already to wear.

By this point it was about noon and I was starving! I didn't want to eat a lot because I didn't want to mess up my weigh in (yes, I am OCD thanks!). I got a quick couple tacos from Taco Bell and ended up driving around until my appointment time. I actually was almost late because I hit some stupid lunch time traffic. I got into the office on time but was delayed by a poor girl sitting in the waiting room with contractions. She had come in for her 39 week appointment with them but the doctor wanted to just keep an eye on her for a little bit before sending her to L&D.

I finally got called back and weighed (Only up another pound...), they took my blood pressure which was a little high for me (118/80). I just attributed that to being stressed and running late? And then I sat there for a good 10 more minutes waiting for my doctor. She finally came in and we chatted a little about her hectic morning. My belly was measuring 33.5 cm, so right on track there. And then...

Then my world decided to flip upside down for a few. This doctor (little Indian lady) is normally so good at figuring out baby's position just by prodding and feeling my tummy. She did that for a bit and then whipped out the doppler. She started moving it all across my lower belly and we heard nothing. She made a concerned face, squirted more ultrasound goo on my belly and tried again. And again...nothing. I was trying so hard to breathe and just not panic, but it has never taken more than a few seconds to find his heartbeat before...and he is BIG now! Shouldn't it be easier? After a few more minutes, my doctor said she would be right back and came back with a couple nurses (each equipped with their own dopplers). They each took their turns and made more concerned faces. After what seemed like an eternity (and right on the brink of some serious tears and panic), my doctor found Peanut all curled up on my right side. His heart beat was literally coming from my right hip...he was really tucked in there.

The second she found him, she said, "There he is!" and let me listen to his heartbeat for much longer than normal. She said he sounded good and strong and that he was just being sneaky and hiding. I swear I have never been more scared of anything in my life. I guess you don't realize how much of your heart is really inside your belly until something like that happens.

My doctor asked me a few questions about where I typically feel his movements. I told her always on the right or left side, never really down low or up high. She said he's still laying sideways in there...this time he does have his head down a little bit (to the right), his butt up towards my right ribs and his legs spread across to the left. She estimated him at about 4.5 pounds and 16 inches although she said his length is harder because he's kind of balled up in there. My tummy felt weird like I'd stretched a muscle when I left, I think probably because of all the prodding, Peanut twisted funny in there. Since I left, he's been kicking and sliding up a storm in there...so apparently he just wanted to give me a damn heart attack!

As far as everything else, my doctor did not give me a concrete diagnosis of SPD...she said the pain I'm feeling could be because of how he is laying in there. She told me exactly what I thought she would: stop working, walking so much and ice it if it gets really bad. *sigh* I seriously am still wired for sound. It's going to take me awhile to calm down from the events of today.

33 Weeks!

I feel like I am running out of original ways to say, "I cannot believe I am this pregnant!" This week has brought some new adventures and trials though just like always. After calling my doctor about the...ahem...crotch pain I have been having, she partially diagnosed me with a condition called SPD over the phone. I say partially because she really cannot be positive til I get looked at on Thursday, but she said all my symptoms were pointing straight to this lovely condition.

SPD, or symphysis pubis dysfunction, is a condition in which the pubic bones shift from the weight of pregnancy or the stress of childbirth. They can grind against each other, click together or even separate from each other. Um. OUCH?! When I looked it up, I learned that 1 in 4 pregnant women suffer with this condition to some degree. The symptoms include pain in the front of the pelvic area (check), audible popping or grinding of the hip bones or pelvic bones (which I totally kept hearing last night as I tossed and turned from side to side), pain in the hips, lower back and down the inside of the legs (check) and things like waddling (check), limping (check), difficulty climbing stairs (check...well, I CAN do it...but it hurts super bad sometimes) and pain when standing/walking for a long time (check). Sounds like a blast, no? Sadly, even if I do indeed have this condition which I most likely do, there is really nothing that can be done. My doctor advised me to sit when in pain, to use ice when necessary and to avoid walking or standing too much when the pain gets really bad.

Some days, I'll feel pretty good until I walk a lot. Then it will start aching. After it starts hurting, it gets worse before it gets better. For this reason, my doctor advised that I be done with work early. When I'm at work, I'm on my feet and walking the whole time. Josh wanted me to quit on April 1st but I just feel at a loss. If I quit this soon, what in the world am I going to be doing until this baby is born? I love working. I've worked full time since I was 17 years old. The decision to be a stay at home mommy for Peanut's first year of life was one that was so hard for me to make simply because I am so independent and actually enjoy the social aspect of going to work every day. I knew it would be hard to give up this independence, but doing it before I actually have a baby to show for it makes me squirmy. I will have about a month of no work and just being pregnant...it makes me feel lazy and helpless. I know it's for the best for my pain level and the fact that I am frequently alone at work. If I were to go into labor at work, I'd kind of be screwed. Time to put on my mom hat a little early I guess. I put in my two week's notice at my job on Saturday. My last day will officially be April 11th, exactly one month before Peanut is due.

I feel like I popped a little more this week...or else my baby has just gone through another growth spurt. Check out this belly:

Sticking straight out there! No wonder my pelvic bones are protesting...he's getting heavy in there! Excuse my wet, messy, curly hair: pregnancy hormones do nutso things to it.

Bump Update:

How far along: 33 Weeks! 47 days to go...ahhhhhh!!!

How big is baby: Last week, Peanut was about 3.5 pounds and they are supposed to gain about half a pound per week, so I'd venture a guess that he is probably between 4 and 4.5 pounds right now! I can tell he's getting bigger...when I feel my super stretched tummy, I can feel parts of him on either side. Until now, he's been easy to find on one side but not the other. Now, wherever I put my hand I can feel some part of him (not that I know what those parts are!) He's also probably reached his birth height of around 17 inches. From now on, his only chub is putting on chub.
Weight Gain: I won't know for sure until Thursday, but I bet I'm climbing again. Just the way my belly is so much bigger this week, I had to have gained a few more pounds. If so, that puts me around 20 to date...a little lower than target but fine by me!
Best moment of the week: Josh took me to see The Hunger Games on Saturday night and I LOVED it so much! This is probably the last movie date we'll go on for awhile...so it was pretty special. Pregnancy does not agree with movies though (hormones!). I only had to leave to pee once during the entire 2 1/2 hours though so I was pretty proud. During one really emotional part, I was so afraid I was going to start doing the ugly cry in the theater. I've read the books so I knew it was coming, but wow. By far, the best book to film adaptation I've ever seen.
Food cravings:  This week I had two polar opposites. Key Lime Pie...and Raisin Bran. Not together! Both of those things sounded like the most amazing thing in the world to me...and they were!
Food aversions: Still not liking anything hot. As you can see in my cravings, I'm wanting food to be cool and refreshing, not filling and warm. We went to my favorite Mexican place on Friday and I had to gag down the food I normally love because it was so rich and warm. Strange.

Symptoms: Crotch pain! Hip pain and popping. Itchy skin from being stretched so much...I've been a lotion fiend this week. Up til now, I have managed no stretch marks on my tummy and I hope I can keep it that way. Insomnia: I've truly lost hope for a restful night's sleep for the remainder of my life.
Movement: My crazy baby is always having dance parties in there. He started doing this new thing where he completely flails.  I can tell because it feels like what a baby looks like when they're startled. Sudden, jerky movement like he thinks he's falling or something? It's so weird!
What I’m looking forward to: My baby shower! It's coming up quick next Sunday and I am both nervous and excited. Nervous because having everyone from all the different aspects of my life together to celebrate me makes me squirmy. Excited because we really need to get on the ball of purchasing baby stuff. Hopefully after the shower, I'll be able to make an inventory of what we still need and we can get it done!
What I miss: Being able to walk without feeling like I'm waddling!

Your WHAT hurts?

That would be the question poor Josh just asked me as I tearily told him about my newest pregnancy woe. You see, I am having some uncommon pain at the moment.

I woke up this morning perfectly fine. I got through this day perfectly fine, including 6 hours on my feet before and during work. And then...I was no longer perfectly fine. It came on pretty suddenly. I'd been feeling Peanut squirming and wriggling all over the place throughout the day. They were new movements for sure: more rolling and sliding in nature than the bumps and thumps I usually feel. I figured maybe he was turning over?

As I was closing the store to leave work, I noticed an extreme pressure pretty low down in my abdomen. I thought to myself, "hmm that feels weird. Peanut must be sitting really low in there." It was not painful really, just like a heavy feeling. Then, I had to pee really bad out of nowhere. So I did. Then 5 minutes later, I had to pee really bad again...like I hadn't just went. Again, I thought to myself, "Peanut must be down low putting pressure on my bladder."

I drove to my mom's house to get Charlie and sat and visited with her for awhile. I noticed that when I walked, I was waddling a little bit. This just enforced that Peanut was really down low in my pelvis, but I was not too concerned. Until I walked up the stairs to my apartment.

Just the simple act of walking up stairs made something shift in there and my ahem...pubic bone...literally feels like it is being ripped in half. Everything around it feels badly bruised and sore all of a sudden and the pain is beginning to radiate down the inside of my legs. Long story short, it really feels like I got kicked really hard...in the crotch. Trying to explain this to Josh was a little awkward and I feel bad because he doesn't know what to do. I did laugh a little when he asked if I wanted ice. Do I? I don't quite know yet...do I want to ice my crotch??

For now, I took two extra strength Tylenol and as long as I sit "indian style" it feels okay, but the second I try to move, or heaven forbid take a step it feels like I am being ripped in half. After some googling (always a bad idea) it seems like it might be just normal ligament pain from the baby stretching things out...I'll be calling my doctor in the morning that's for sure. Ah, pregnancy...

32 Weeks!

At my 32 week appointment on Thursday, my doctor gave me an eye opening fact. She told me that if I go into labor now, there is really no use in panicking and rushing in to the hospital...because they wouldn't do anything to stop Peanut from entering the world at this point. She called him "fair game." If he decides to make his entrance now, they'll just let him come. He is big enough, strong enough and well developed enough that he would do fine in the outside world with just a little extra help. Talk about a wake up call. I know I still have 8 weeks left and I'd like to carry him inside me that whole time, but honestly...it's up to him. And I could have a baby at anytime. Scary, but amazing.

I've been feeling pretty good the last couple of weeks. Of course I have the usual heartburn and trouble sleeping, but besides those completely normal things, I have felt almost normal. Well, as normal as can be with a basketball attached to my belly. I am slowly accepting this pregnant body of mine and I know now how to work with it instead of letting it work against me. I can totally do this for 8 more weeks. (Remind me of this statement in another few weeks when I finally hit the miserable stage, please).

My baby shower invites are out and it's coming up fast on April 1st. I was sitting here thinking that was so far away but really it's only two weeks! I really hate being the center of attention, especially when I feel so uncomfortable in my own skin right now but I know it will be fun. It's always hard for me to accept being "showered" with anything, especially attention, without feeling awkward. I just have to tell myself that they will be showering Peanut...for now, I'm just his vessel. You can't have one without the other!

I don't feel like I've grown very much from last week at all, my belly is still big but no bigger than it has been I don't think. One thing I have noticed is that my wedding ring feels a little snug by nighttime. It still slides on and off easily in the morning, but by the end of the day, it starts to feel uncomfortable. As much as I don't want to, I think I may have to retire it for awhile. The last thing I want is to have to cut it off of my finger.

Here's my 32 week belly:

This is actually one of the few maternity shirts I own, and I feel like it's a tent when I wear it. I'm going to have to bite the bullet and buy some soon though, this belly won't fit in my normal shirts much longer.

Bump Update:
How far along: 32 Weeks! 54 days to go...wow, we are really getting down there. Technically, only 5 weeks until I am "full term" at 37 weeks. Whoa!

How big is baby: At my most recent appointment, my doctor estimated Peanut at about 3.5 pounds based on what she could feel (I think it is totally weird that they can do that, by the way!) He's also pretty cramped in there. I found out he was wedged sideways, or kind of diagonal, at my appointment. My doctor says she thinks he has more room in there that way rather than up and down since my torso is so short. Sorry, Peanut! We have to keep our eye on him and make sure he flips before 36 weeks, otherwise the dreaded C-section topic will have to be discussed.
Weight Gain: I only gained half a pound since my last appointment, which baffles me. At this point, baby will gain a half pound a week until the end. It's good to know I am only gaining what baby is gaining right now. If Peanut is 3.5 pounds now that means we can estimate that he'll be around 7.5 pounds at birth! Pretty cool.
Best moment of the week: I got a few unexpected days off of work this week due to scheduling drama so it was nice to have a little mini vacation.
Food cravings:  Still loving the lemon things. And donuts has really been a big one for me lately. I haven't eaten as many as I've wanted to but I sure have been craving them! Also, celery. I am so strange.
Food aversions: Anything warm and too rich. I think maybe because it is so nice outside, but I have no desire to eat really hot food. All I want is fresh, cool things to eat. 

Symptoms: A little annoying pain behind my right knee where I have a bad vericose vein. Heartburn and insomnia as usual.
Movement: All the time! I think Peanut may actually have flipped into position again because I feel all these strange, sliding movements now in addition to all his bumps and thumps.
What I’m looking forward to: Finding something cute to wear for my baby shower. And I am totally treating myself to a pedicure this week too. My toes always look cuter when someone else paints them!
What I miss: Margaritas!!!! Now that it's nice and warm outside and everyone wants to sit on the patio and drink, I find myself getting so jealous!

Pregnant Girl Problems

My May Mommies and I have started kind of an inside joke where we share random things that happen to us and then throw on the hash tag #pregnantgirlproblems. For those that don't know, hash tags are used on twitter and facebook to indicate the main "theme" of your post pretty much. It's just silly. But I literally go through my every day life rolling my eyes at things and adding it to the ever growing list of Pregnant Girl Problems in my head.

This post is inspired by one of those very problems. It is 1:16 a.m and I am wide awake. I wasn't wide awake an hour ago. In fact, for the first time in weeks, my head hit the pillow and I was fast asleep. Then about fifteen minutes ago, I was woken up by my stomach growling so loudly that it scared me! I was starving! I had to actually get out of bed and I went to the kitchen to make my new obsession: Peanut butter, banana and honey sandwiches. Now, I am completely awake. That, my friends, is what we call a #pregnantgirlproblem or a #pgp. :)

Here are some of my other personal faves:

1. When your shirts that previously showed no cleavage are absolutely obscene without a camisole underneath.

2. When every time you sneeze, you have to cross your legs to stop yourself from peeing your pants.

3. When even water gives you heartburn.

4. When you haven't shaved your legs in weeks because it is impossible to bend in the proper way to reach around your huge belly.

5. When hearing a random song on the radio somehow relates to your baby and you start bawling on your way to work.

6. When the only thing you really crave is from a restaurant that closed 5 years ago. And your attempts to create it at home are such fails that you want to cry.

7. When you spend 10 minutes looking frantically for the sunglasses that are on top of your head or your keys that you left hanging in the door.

8. When you find yourself doing super corny things you swore you would never do when you got pregnant like holding your belly and talking to your unborn child.

9. When you swear you can smell the drain as you are brushing your teeth. (Josh literally thinks I am insane for this one by the way).

10. When you have to rock back and forth to build enough momentum to roll out of bed.

There are plenty more where those came from, but those are my favorites at the moment. Being pregnant really is an odd time...full of hilarious mishaps and things I'm positive I'll look back on and laugh at later. I hope.

31 Weeks!

Okay. It's time to admit that now I'm getting scared. Not about anything rational of course, because that's not my style. I'm getting scared that this child of mine is never going to be still outside of the womb because he certainly never stays still inside of it. I absolutely love the baby movements. I really do. I love that each time he wiggles, it's a new adventure of what I am going to see and feel...but really...I wonder sometimes how much movement is too much movement!

In other news, Josh and I ventured to the hospital today to take our tour of the Labor and Delivery wing. I was really looking forward to this just so I could be reassured that we had a home for our baby to be born. Josh was excited because he just wanted to know where he needed to park! It was a fast tour, but I am so glad we did it.

I've heard horror stories about hospital deliveries being all about the wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am type of delivery where the doctors force pitocin to speed labor and then perform unnecessary c-sections because they don't want a woman taking up a bed for 18+ hours. I can now confidently say that Rose Medical Center (where we will be delivering) is not one of those hospitals. I am so reassured to know that they are a mommy friendly hospital. I haven't talked about this much yet, but I truly hope to achieve a natural vaginal delivery if possible. I am not adverse to an epidural if I decide I want one, but I'd at least like to try without. The nurse that gave us the tour told us about several things they do differently to ensure the happiest labor experience possible and it made me a very happy mama:

* 12 private Labor and Delivery suites.
The minute I arrive at the hospital, I am admitted to my own private suite and left there to my own devices pretty much while I labor with only intermittent monitoring. The nurse explained that they like their patients to get up and walk around, try laboring in different positions, etc. and they don't believe in strapping patients down with monitors and stuff. These suites have a private bathroom complete with a jacuzzi tub that we are free to labor in if we want (big plus! I hear water is the best way to relieve contraction pain) She also told us that the fetal monitors they have are wireless and waterproof, so we can move about freely and in the water without worrying about baby's heart rate.

*Mommy/Baby Friendly Policies:
What excited me most about this tour was learning that this hospital truly likes to ensure the mommy/baby bond right from birth. They believe in immediate skin to skin contact while the cord pulses out instead of whisking the baby away to be cleaned/measured/etc right away. I always wanted this experience but I thought whisking the baby away was just something that happened. The nurse told us unless there is a medical issue, they usually let the bonding begin immediately while the mom delivers the placenta (ew) and gets stitched up if necessary. Then, sometime within the first hour of life, they take the baby for measurements and a quick rub down as well as the Vitamin K injection and eye ointment. The nurse said they never separate baby and mommy unless absolutely necessary. They will wheel in a little bassinet and the baby gets to stay right by your side the whole time. They are also pro-breastfeeding and encourage immediate suckling after birth which I think is fantastic...babies that are allowed to do this right away usually take to it better than babies that don't get this opportunity.

*Josh's Bonus Points:
This is important, because letting Josh feel comfortable here will make me more comfortable. These are the things Josh was excited about:
Easy Parking (with valet service for laboring mommies!)
A HUGE waiting room down the hall from the labor suites where family can stay during the action. And there are sweet vending machines. :)
Free wi-fi on the whole floor for all the facebooking and updating we're sure to do right after.
A full size bed in the labor suite just in case we need some rest in the middle of the action.
Free meals!

Whew! In all, I feel so much better just knowing that this is all going to be real and that I will be supported in whatever decision I make on the day I deliver my baby. With no further ado, here is my growing 31 week bump:

I've taken to calling this "torpedo belly" because he sticks straight out in a little point.


Bump Update:
How far along: 31 Weeks! 63 Days to go...*gulp*

How big is baby: One of my "May Mommies" just had her baby this week due to issues with pre-eclampsia. She was 5 days ahead of me and little Madelynn weighed 3.7 pounds and is absolutely perfect. It made everything so much more real to see what my Peanut would look like as an "outside baby" if he were born right now.
Weight Gain: If I know my body, I've probably gained another 2 since my last appointment so that puts me right around 17 I'd bet.
Best moment of the week: The tour of course!
Food cravings:  All things lemon. Lemonade. Lemon jelly filled donuts (not custard filled....blech!) and lemon chicken have all been in my mind this week. Lemonade is probably the strongest craving I've had this whole pregnancy. I love it so much! The warm weather makes me crave it too.
Food aversions: Eggs. I tried eating eggs for pretty much the first time in this pregnancy the other night and it did not go well. I ordered a ham and cheese omelet and my eggs were brown and burnt tasting. UGH! I don't think I'll be eating eggs again anytime soon. :/

Symptoms:  Hip pain...so flipping bad! I can't lay on one side too long or they really start to ache. The usual heartburn and constant nausea are there too but otherwise, I really don't feel too bad right now!
Movement: Constant. Strong. Jerky. Crazy.
What I’m looking forward to: The real nesting bug to hit. I had little spurts of it awhile ago, but Josh and I have so much little stuff to still get situated before baby, I hope I get inspired soon!
What I miss: Definitely still missing my pre-pregnancy body. You never realize how good you once looked until you look like crap! :)

Milestone Time!

Like he does every night around this time (10:00 pm), little Peanut started having a break dance party inside my tummy. I have been sneakily trying to capture his new huge, Alien-esque movements on my phone and also to get Josh to see them. Every stinking time I would get Josh to look, the baby would be still. Josh would look away and he would start again. Already a little punk!

But not tonight! I started feeling some huge movements and lifted up my shirt like I always do to see him move. Sure enough, my belly was bouncing and jerking all over the place. I just so happened to say, "baby...look" to Josh and right as he looked over my tummy did one of the craziest bulging movements I have seen so far. Josh literally yelled, "WHOA!"

I about died laughing from his reaction. Then it became a game for Josh. He would poke my belly and Peanut would kick back. So he took my cell phone and set it on there and Peanut kicked it off! We were laughing hysterically. (By the way, laughing with a pregnant belly makes me feel like Santa Claus). Josh even tried blowing raspberries on my belly (ewww) and Peanut still kicked right along. It was so much fun experiencing that with Josh tonight. It's been real for me for awhile and Josh has felt the baby...but to actually see it is such an amazing (if a little creepy) thing!

30 Weeks!

I made it! For some reason, 30 weeks has been a milestone I've been longing to hit for awhile. I don't really know why? It's a nice round number and it means only 10 weeks to go until Peanut is here.

At this point, I am *so* over being pregnant. It's not that I want Peanut to come sooner than planned, it's just I've been struggling getting used to all these big changes in my body. Now that my belly is large and in charge (not to mention other random parts of me...like my face!) I am just ready to have my body back. I would do anything for this child and I know it will all be worth it in the end, but I just do not like the way I look right now at all.
After much thought and seeing some pictures of me taken recently, I really think I am going to skip maternity photos. I can look decent in my weekly self portraits but that's because I am in control. I am just so not comfortable in my own skin right now at all. I feel super chubby in my face (maybe due to the adorable double chin I've suddenly developed) and thinking of being in front of the camera for any extended period of time makes me want to cry. I went out with friends last night and they were very picture happy and I was squirming...I hated being forced to smile for pictures when I felt so gross. And, seeing those pictures posted today took a serious hit on my self esteem.

I know I am being silly and will probably get yelled at for this post, but I just cannot force myself to do a maternity photo shoot. I don't like maternity pictures all that much anyway, and I've taken plenty of pictures to remember my growing belly during this pregnancy. I hope later on down the road, my child won't resent me for not doing a professional session of him in my belly. My fragile self esteem aside, we cannot really afford any extra expenses right now anyway.

*Sigh* Now that I've thrown myself a wicked pity party, here's my 30 week belly:

Bump Update:
How far along: 30 Weeks! 70 days left! 

How big is baby: 15.5 - 16.5 inches! I have trouble visualizing that but it seems so big! Baby is probably about 3.5 or 4 lbs right now.
Weight Gain: I was officially up 15 pounds at my 30 week appointment on Thursday.
Sleep: I am thinking this question needs to be deleted soon because it is getting ridiculous. Between the heartburn, leg cramps and heavy belly, sleep is just something I don't enjoy anymore.
Best moment of the week: Seeing some old friends and having them share my excitement about the baby was fun...even if I did feel huge and uncomfortable.
Food cravings:  Blue things! I had a crazy week of wanting blue jello and then blue kool aid...guess my body knows it's having a boy!
Food aversions:  Still hating pepperoni. Bleh. Anything greasy is making my stomach turn too.

Symptoms:  I'm still having lots of Charley horses in my feet and calves. My feet start aching after standing/walking too long (guess that's what 15 extra pounds does!), hip pain and heartburn all the time. Other than that, I feel great!
Movement: I have a strong boy in there! His movements are really starting to make me jump because they are so intense. He is still mostly moving early in the morning and late at night, but I've recently started feeling him throughout the day as well. The first time I felt him kick when I was standing was really strange!
What I’m looking forward to: Josh and I have our tour of the hospital and labor and delivery coming up this weekend. I think it will be nice to actually get a feel for where this baby is going to be born. We can also pre-register so that when I am in labor, I don't have to worry about paperwork!
What I miss: My body. As many problems that I had with it before, it was mine and I was at least semi-comfortable in it. I hate this sudden fear of a camera coming out around me...ugh.

Umm, Ow?

I have a definite new pregnancy symptom this week...

                                                         Holy flipping back pain!


I thought maybe, just maybe I would escape that fun little symptom. As I near week 30 however, I am realizing that is NOT the case. At first I thought I somehow pulled something. The pain is right in the dead center of my back, on either side of my spine. It is not a constant ache...it is a shocking twinge if I move or stretch the wrong way. And let me tell you how many "wrong ways" there are!

The only thing I have found that helps (besides not moving...) is warmth. My heating pad has been my constant companion at home. When that is not working, I turn to my new best friend: Bubble Baths.

I remember reading in my early weeks of pregnancy that hot baths were a bad idea. Well...obviously whoever said that clearly does NOT understand this back pain I'm feeling. Just to ensure that I don't hardboil Peanut, I make sure the water is not hot enough to make my skin red, but still warm enough to relax my muscles. The funny thing? No matter how I lay in the tub, I cannot get my tummy under the water! I have begun using a hand towel and just laying it over my tummy so it doesn't get cold. Peanut LOVES these baths. Every time I get in, he starts kicking away in there...I think he likes the warmth.

Even though the baths are nice and my skin is really soft, these back pains can stop at any time. I somehow have a feeling this one is not going away though...

29 Weeks!

Finally! An uneventful week in life and pregnancy. Nothing too crazy or spectacular happened to us this week, and it was so nice to just feel normal for a minute. My biggest concern right now is what we are going to do with our monster-dog when the baby gets here.

Around Josh and me, Charlie is a wonderful dog. He is fun, playful, gentle and acts completely normal. Throw anyone else into the mix and his personality changes entirely. He has gotten used to my close family so he is fine around them but any "stranger" to him comes around and he becomes The Devil. He is not fixed which is our number one problem. We definitely plan on doing that before the baby comes. I am just worried because he's already 2...we probably waited too long for neutering to have any real effect on his actions. He is a "heeler" by breed so he does this annoying thing where he creeps around like a little stalker and then suddenly nips at people's clothing. I've seen him get skin more than once, but I don't think he really aims to injure.

I've had dogs my whole life and never had to deal with these type of issues before. He's just odd. I think mostly, he is very territorial of me especially (but also my mom). When Josh is around, he still does these things but not as much. I just do NOT want my baby being the target of Charlie-nip-attacks. I would never get rid of a pet but it does scare me to think that we don't have control over him the way we want: he jumps, he's wild, he nips...ugh.

As far as everything else, I've actually felt much better this week. Taking the iron supplements hasn't been as hard on my digestive system as everyone led me to believe. My doctor told me to take it in the morning with a glass of orange juice and it seems that is keeping things on track. The extra iron has gotten rid of my exhaustion and dizziness and thankfully no more fainting spells have occurred. I always get proud of myself when I can get through an entire shower without feeling like I'm going to pass out.

Peanut has been kicking away in there. He is strong! Some of his movements jerk my entire stomach to the side...that is a crazy feeling! I also felt baby hiccups for the first time this week...talk about a strange sensation. It feels just like when I get hiccups: rhythmic, jerky motions every couple seconds except its in my belly way down below my belly button. I think Peanut has finally shifted head down for a couple reasons. The first being where I felt those hiccups. Also because I swear sometimes he gets a foot lodged in my ribs...it feels like an extreme runners cramp. I was told to ice my ribs when that happens and he should squirm away. It works! Last night I did it and not only did he move, but he started kicking at the ice. I guess my little guy doesn't like the cold!

Here's my 29 Week belly:

I do believe the basketball belly is here to stay. They say you carry boys all up front and I'd have to agree...my belly sticks straight out!

Bump Update:
How far along:  29 Weeks! 77 days to go!!

How big is baby: Supposedly the size of an acorn squash, but who really knows what that is? I hate squash! Baby is probably about 16 inches long and in between 2.5 and 3.5 pounds right now! Getting so big!
Weight Gain: 14 pounds as of 28 weeks. I'm sure I'm probably up about 15 right now though.
Sleep: Huh? What's sleep? This belly is getting heavy, and getting comfy is a thing of the past. I now pee like clockwork at 3:00 am and 6:00 am, sometimes I get extra special nights where I'm also up at 1:00am. I would drink less before bed but I'm always so thirsty. It's probably just the name of the game at this point.
Best moment of the week: Baby hiccups! It was funny to feel them and try to imagine what my poor baby must be thinking in there...hiccups are weird! I'm sure he was going, "what the heck is going on?" They lasted about an hour too! Josh felt them too but they kind of freaked him out. They were pretty jerky and intense.
Food cravings:  Lucky Charms :) And baby loves them too! He always gets super kicky after I eat some. I had my sushi craving again this week and Josh took me out on Friday night for yummy California rolls. Mmm.
Food aversions:  Pepperoni! The thought of it on pizza makes me want to vomit...it's sooooo greasy and disgusting. UGH!
Symptoms:  Rib pain when Peanut gets a foot stuck, some Braxton Hicks contractions if I try to walk too fast for too long (annoying!), Charley horses in my feet at night and some new not fun hip pain... but otherwise feeling pretty good this week!
Movement: I've noticed a distinct pattern for the little guy's movements. In the morning when I wake up I can feel him kicking away and right after I eat breakfast. Then he's usually pretty still all day long until after dinner when he starts his dance party for the evening. And it usually does last all evening. I still feel him when I lay down to go to sleep.
What I’m looking forward to: Next week's appointment and talking to my doctor about a growth ultrasound. I don't think I get anymore ultrasounds for the rest of the pregnancy, but I wish I could know how big my baby is and if he's doing okay in there.
What I miss: I have a feeling this question is always going to relate to my toes from here on out. I had a snaggy toe nail the other day and trying to cut my toe nails was quite possibly the hardest thing I've ever done!

28 Weeks!

Phew! We had a whirlwind of a weekend and I am so tired! We mostly just spent the whole weekend with Josh's family for various get togethers, which is always so nice. I always wanted a big family and I definitely married into one. It's fun seeing all the relatives who don't come around much, I got lots of belly rubs and pats this weekend.

Today was also a special day for Josh and I because it is the day we started dating 6 years ago. Although our relationship was a rocky, immature one at first, it quickly grew into a deeper kind of love than I ever knew existed. It's hard to believe we were only teenagers at the time (I was 18, he was 17) and how much has changed since then. It is amazing to think of all the things that happen and all the figurative stars that had to align for us to even end up in the same place at the same time. We were meant to be together...I can't explain it, but I can feel it. There is a Ben Folds song that makes me cry every time because it is really the closest I can ever get to explaining how amazing this feels. My favorite part of the song says,

I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns
The stumbles and falls brought me here
And where was I before the day that I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday...and I know that I am the luckiest.

He is honestly everything to me. The love that I feel for him is just unparalleled. Sometimes I think of the future and how devastated I would be if anything ever happened to him. He is the best man I have ever known. And he loves me the way every woman deserves to be loved. I cannot wait to see him become a father.

Here's my beach ball belly at 28 weeks:

Bump Update:
How far along:  28 Weeks! 84 days to go!

How big is baby: Basically the same size still (14 inches and around 2.5 pounds) but just putting on layers of chub at this point!
Weight Gain: 14 pounds at my last appointment. Finally on track and doing well with that.
Sleep: Ugh. I MISS sleep! I have developed the infamous pregnancy insomnia. I just cannot sleep...even if I am dead tired and perfectly comfortable. It is so frustrating.
Best moment of the week: Spending a little extra time with family has been nice and much needed lately. Remembering all of the crazy things that have happened to Josh and I in our 6 years together was also fun.  Food cravings:  Lucky Charms. :) Baby likes them too!
Symptoms:  Soreness under my ribs, insomnia, heartburn, exhaustion.
Movement: Kicking away in there. There is no rhyme or reason to his movement. He pretty much just moves whenever and however he wants!
What I’m looking forward to: Our childbirth classes this weekend. I have a feeling everything will get much more REAL after that. So far, I've been able to live in denial that this baby doesn't actually have to come out. Eek!
What I miss: Mostly just sleep. And still missing being able to see/paint my toes. That's not gonna change for awhile!

28 Week Appointment

This appointment was really no different than every other one leading up to it. I met with the final doctor in the practice and ended up liking her the best of them all. She's younger and very sweet. It's good to know I'll be comfortable with whatever doctor is on call the day Peanut decides to make his appearance.

I am up 14 pounds at almost 28 weeks so that puts me right on track. If I gain a pound a week from now until the end that will make me 26 pounds total...and I'm thinking I'll be closer to 30 but I'm okay with that. I'm eating well and being active enough, my body will just gain what it wants to at this point.

My blood pressure was great at 110/70 which was a relief after it was a little higher in the E.R last week (maybe because I was in the E.R? Haha) The doctor did say I had an elevated white blood cell count in my urine but no symptoms of a urinary tract infection or bladder infection so she was not too worried about it. I don't really know what's up with that?

We listened in on Peanut and it took her awhile to find him. She spent some time prodding and massaging my belly and making lots of surprised faces. Then she told me the little bugger is laying transverse across my belly. His head is in my right hip and his feet are in my left hip. I really don't know how he fits like that, but it would explain the bruised feeling I had the other day as he probably got wedged in there for a little while. She says it's nothing to worry about because he still has plenty of time to move and he's probably trying to make his way into the head down position. His little heart rate (found right around my right hip) was up in the 150s again so his heart is nice and strong.

The most surreal part of all this is now I'll start going to the doctor every 2 weeks rather than every 4. I already have another appointment on March 1st! It's going so fast!

27 Weeks/Third Trimester!

Oh.my.goodness. How is it possible that we are in the homestretch already? It seems like just yesterday I was obsessively peeing on sticks and looking for that second pink line. Now, here we are with only 13 short weeks to go and I am really in disbelief. I know at times I have said this pregnancy is dragging...but in the grand scheme of things, it has just flown by!

It has been a rough week for me physically. The whole passing out/dizzy episode followed by just not feeling well for the rest of the week. Now it seems that my first trimester exhaustion and nausea have made their very unwelcome return. My body just seems angry all the time right now. I noticed today actually that anytime I eat/drink something really sugary my heart feels like it is pounding out of my chest for awhile afterwards. Uhm, that can't be good. I looked it up and it seems to be hypoglycemia (aka low blood sugar). I've thought I've had this problem often in my life but it just seems to make sense right now. Remember in the ER when my blood glucose was only a 90 about half an hour after eating? (Anything below 70 is dangerously low and 130 is too high). The symptoms include: fast or pounding heartbeat, headache, dizziness, weakness and can cause fainting. Hmm... I still haven't heard anything about my glucose tolerance test but I'll definitely be bringing this up with my doctor this week. And until then, not eating/drinking anything too sugary because it is an awful feeling. The heart pounding makes me feel out of breath and panicky. It sucks!

I am also having trouble breathing in general. This baby tends to change positions greatly depending on the day. Just a few days ago, he was settled in so low I could feel him putting pressure on my cervix. Now, he is up so high that my lungs cannot fully expand and my ribs are sore! Make up your mind, kid! Getting comfortable at night is also becoming a lost cause. I have to sleep with a pillow supporting the weight of my belly or else my back starts hurting really bad. My neck continues to be sore because of these weird sleeping positions. It's just not a comfy time for me!

I believe I experienced my first Braxton Hicks contractions this week too. I was just standing in the kitchen and all of a sudden it felt like my whole belly was getting tight, especially around my belly button. It didn't hurt, but it was not exactly a comfortable sensation. It lasted a few seconds then went away. Then it happened a couple more times in the next few hours. I drank lots of water and laid down and they went away. Strange!

I also realized I can no longer see my feet when I'm standing! My bump doesn't seem *that* huge yet, but it's clearly in my way...and my feet are little. Maybe I can use that as an excuse? Here's my view looking down:

Here's another fun picture of my big baby bump...it's a weird angle so I look like a bobble-head, but I kinda like it!

Finally, here's my weekly update. Big belly! I can never remember which way I stood before...so I flipped this one!

27 Week Bump Update:
How far along:  27 Weeks! 91 Days to go!

How big is baby: Supposedly the size of a cauliflower. (is that how you spell that...?) Around 14 inches and 2 pounds. And I can feel it!
Weight Gain: I'd bet I'm still around 11/12 pounds. I haven't been feeling well so I haven't been eating a lot at all. The belly sure is growing though! It makes me feel better that whatever the baby needs, he just takes from me. I'm happy to provide.
Sleep: I miss this thing you call sleep. I wish I could just take a solid 48 hours and pass out. I am always completely and totally exhausted.
Best moment of the week: Scheduling our childbirth classes was one good thing in a week of yuck, so we'll go with that.I also got some baby nesting done. I bought little canvas totes and baskets to hold all of his things on an empty bookshelf. That's really all I'll need to buy until after the baby shower and then we can re-assess what we need. I also got a little crafty and decided to make a little decoration for the shelf. I did the first letter of baby's name with a wooden letter, some scrapbook paper and paint. So I guess here's a hint on his name (most of you that read this already know it!)

Food cravings:  Capri Suns still. Orange juice. Anything banana-ish. Banana cream pie has been a big craving lately.
Symptoms:  Sore spots on my belly where I believe little Peanut has a foot or elbow lodged. It's just a bruised, tender feeling in a small little area. If I press on it, it goes away for awhile but then he goes right back to whatever he was doing. Everything I talked about earlier: exhaustion, nausea, headaches, trouble breathing...
Movement: Still a little wiggler. His movements are starting to get stronger too...some kicks take my breath away!
What I’m looking forward to: My doctor's appointment and figuring out what the heck is wrong with me lately (probably nothing besides being pregnant...lol). I will start going every two weeks instead of every four now...talk about a wake up call!
What I miss: Days without nausea. Getting up without having to grunt like an old man! Seeing my feet...and well, anything below my belly button for that matter.

Baby Mama Drama

No there is not another baby mama in our lives...I am simply talking about me and my penchant for drama. What can I say? I was born a drama queen. I just can't help it sometimes! Hmm...where to begin?

I woke up at 4:00am on Tuesday morning like always, because I had to pee. However, when I opened my eyes, I was flat on my back. And the room was spinning. Not just little tilts...but honest to goodness spinning like I'd just stepped off an amusement park ride. Drunk. I very slowly maneuvered myself to my left side, thinking maybe the weight of my uterus had been cutting off blood flow to my brain or something. Just rolling over like that I swear I thought I was going to fall off the bed. I tried to steady my breathing and just relax for a minute and as long as I did not move my head, the dizziness was bearable. Despite my need to pee, I laid there on my left side until about 6:30 when Josh's alarm started to go off. I let him know that I was awake and really dizzy and he helped me sit up in bed and brought me a glass of water.

After awhile, I felt okay enough to venture to the bathroom finally. But just the effort of walking that far and trying to stabilize myself left me completely drained. As Josh headed off to work, I got another glass of water and settled myself on the couch. I knew I had to work at 3:00 so I was just hoping the dizzy spell resolved itself. Throughout the morning, I tried everything I could think of that had previously worked to relieve dizziness: eating protein, eating sugar, drinking water, laying back down on my left side. Nothing could stop the sickening tilting of the room whenever I moved my head. It was miserable....but despite the dizziness and a minor stiff/sore neck (which I assumed was from sleeping funny) I felt okay. No nausea. No fever. No headache.

Finally at around 2:00, I felt okay enough to go get ready for work. I made it down to my car with Charlie and I was stuck in the stupid snow again. Instead of freaking out, I called Josh and took Charlie for a walk around our apartment complex. This was no easy task since apparently they don't believe in shoveling or plowing anything. To repay them, I let Charlie poop on the sidewalk and did not clean it up. Hah! Josh said he could be home in half an hour to take me to work.

After this little walk, I suddenly felt much MUCH worse. I came back upstairs and sat down on the couch and closed my eyes to try to stop my head from spinning. I was so concerned with how I was supposed to do my job when I could barely walk for 10 minutes without feeling awful but with my track record the last couple days I was just going to suck it up and go. I heard Josh fumbling for his keys outside and got up to let him in. All I remember after that is him yelling, "honey!" and then I opened my eyes and I was on the floor with Charlie scrambling all over me.

I passed out. But somehow had the frame of mind to set myself semi gently down on my butt before I completely blacked out. My vision was black. I could not see anything. So I just laid there on the floor blinking for a couple minutes while Josh frantically called my doctors to see what he needed to do. Apparently, the doctor working that day was with a patient so she had to call him back. He finally got me up on the couch and my vision was returning a little bit. I had pretty intense tunnel vision and the light seemed soooo bright. Josh insisted I eat a spoonful of peanut butter and drink some water. All I can really say about this whole time frame was that I honestly felt drunk. I was slurring my words, my head would not stay up...my neck kept lolling to the side and my eyes were bothering me so badly.

Finally, my doctor called back and after talking to Josh for a little bit, he handed the phone to me. She asked me a bunch of questions which I tried to answer even though concentrating was really hard. She was just about to tell me to rest and call her if I still felt bad the next day when I mentioned to her that I woke up with a stiff neck. She went on red alert then and told me to get straight to the E.R. I know what she was thinking: meningitis...but I was not worried about that because I knew I did not have a fever. To be honest, I just wanted to go get checked out to make sure everything was okay with Peanut.

Josh and I got to experience the drive to the hospital for the first time. He was so sweet the whole time, always checking in with me to make sure I was okay. And he was the perfect worried daddy/husband...getting mad about traffic lights and bad drivers.

We arrived at the E.R and they already knew I was coming (thanks, Dr. Berenbaum!) so they took me straight back to an exam room. I was still so loopy and out of it during this time period. I know they took my blood pressure (125/75...a little higher than normal for me) and my temperature (98.6...totally normal). Then they had me put on a hospital gown and lay in bed. Before I knew it, I had a team of people surrounding me. They hooked me up to an I.V, took about 6 vials of blood and started putting sticky monitors all over me for an EKG. I remember thinking, wow...an EKG. I thought only old people having heart attacks got those. It all registered, but barely. I think I talked to like 4 doctors about my symptoms and what happened. They brought in a portable ultrasound machine to check on Peanut and everything looked good.We even saw his little legs kicking away...right on my left hip where I'd been feeling him all day.

Just like that, the people all cleared out and Josh and I were left there to wonder what the heck was going on. It was about that time that my mom showed up. I'm sure I gave her a panic attack with my antics. We all just sat there kind of talking waiting to hear something. I know the doctors were testing me for everything: heart murmur, infections, etc. I started to feel a little better as the IV bag emptied into my arm. My head was slowly clearing and I felt coherent again...although definitely hungover. I had a pounding headache and still just felt odd. Eventually the doctor came back in and told me all my labs looked normal and they devised that I was most likely just dehydrated. They unhooked me and sent me on my merry way. I kind of just sat there blinking like, really? A pregnant lady is dizzy all day, passes out and dehydration is all you've got as far as an answer?

We couldn't really do anything else so we left. Josh and I went to Village Inn and got some much needed food and I actually drank a Coke because I felt like it would help my head (it did.) I was told not to do much the next couple of days...just drink and rest so that's what I've been doing. I still feel weird. Just...not right. I'm not dizzy anymore thankfully but I was exhausted and no amount of sleep seemed to help. And that lingering headache just would not go away.

My doctor called me the next day to tell me she was given all my bloodwork and that she was concerned about my iron levels. She thinks I may be anemic. I looked it up and ding, ding, ding...I think we have a winner! Dizziness, exhaustion, fatigue, headache...all symptoms. She told me to go on a high iron diet and told me to go to the lab for my glucose test (which I still had not taken til today) and they would do a hematocrit test too to check my red blood cell count.

I actually felt a little better this morning and went and took the stupid glucose test. The drink made me wired for sound for a few hours and then I crashed. But in the meantime, I walked around Wal-Mart, got some baby shopping done and bought a bunch of spinach. :) One can later and I feel oddly better. So maybe that is the answer after all. Long (very long!) story short: I am high drama. Better safe than sorry I guess!