Ever since that first plus sign showed up on my first home pregnancy test, I have been spending a fair amount of time over on Thebump.com. It is basically a website for pregnant mommies-to-be to talk and support other pregnant mommies-to-be. There is a lot of information there (like the weekly size updates I share here) and a lot of drama sometimes too. However, the most important thing about that website is the mommy friends I have made.
I was initially shuffled into a "chat room" of sorts for other mommies delivering their babies in May 2012. This group started out huge and was whittled down over time by boredom, ladies just stopped checking in and also a lot of sad cases of losses throughout those first couple months. While I was unsure if it was really "healthy" for me to be witnessing so many tragic losses, I feel like those women got something I never did with my loss. Even though we are all technically internet strangers, we have now spent five months getting to know each other. Those moms that lost their angel babies had hundreds of internet thoughts, prayers and hugs sent their way. They had someone to talk to. They felt the love from people who understood what they were going through. It was actually during those more difficult times that I realized these women who I was "talking to" every day were real women: women who I would be honored to be friends with in real life.
This group has ebbed and flowed and grown pretty close over the last couple months. We post pictures of our growing bumps and our sweet little ultrasounds. We commiserate over the icky parts of pregnancy and laugh about the embarrassing parts. Sometimes, we just talk about nothing. Even though I have never met a single one of these women, I know them and I love them.
The other day, one of the moms on the board suggested creating a Facebook page for all of us to join and be able to be better connected with each other. I know it sounds sketch. These women are technically strangers. But almost all of us agreed to do it. And I am so glad I did. Now, these women are less than strangers...they are Facebook friends. And let's face it, they've become real friends! I am so blessed that I have a hundred and some odd women always rooting for me and telling me they care and sharing ideas with me. I just know once May rolls around, we will all be sharing our birth stories and our baby's first pictures. Who knows? Maybe we will even have a real life reunion.
All I know is that despite all the trouble and drama it can sometimes bring, the internet is truly a remarkable thing. I feel so connected to these women. There are first time mommies like me, mommies with many other kids, mommies of multiples, mommies with multiple losses. And even a couple who are adopting but wanted to share in the whole pre-pregnancy process. I have never really been one to befriend a lot of women in real life...but the internet has bonded this group of us with something we all have in common. And I am so happy it did!