I swear, every time I boast and brag about feeling just a teensy bit better, the Irony Fairy comes around and knocks me back to the beginning. Ugh! As I draw nearer to my 12th week of pregnancy, I am already beginning to see some of my symptoms fading and some completely changing, becoming little hybrids of what they once were.
The newest? Dizziness. Just as all the baby books tell me, the second trimester can bring about dizzy spells. This is because of the dip in blood pressure caused by my blood being taken to little peanut. Good thing for the baby. Not so good for the mama. It is not a fun kind of dizzy. It is nowhere near reminiscent of the spin-around-in-circles-then-fall-down-and-stare-at-the-clouds kind of dizzy we used to initiate when we were little. If I had to equate it to something, I guess I would say it feels like sea-sickness. Just for a moment or two every now and then, my vision tilts a little to the side and I get that horrible queasy vertigo feeling of falling. The good thing? It's not constant. The bad? I never know when it will strike. Sometimes it hits when I am standing, sometimes all I am doing is turning my head...all I know is I don't wanna play anymore!
The sameness? Headaches. I was not one to get many headaches before being pregnant. If I had a headache, I automatically knew I was getting sick and would check myself for a fever. Nowadays they are a pretty common occurrence. Sometimes they coincide with the dizziness and that is just a whole bundle of fun. I mostly think they are tension headaches...the pain feels like a band around my skull and a knot in my neck and shoulders. All I know is Tylenol does not touch them. So today, after approximately 48 hours of my head swimming, pounding and feeling loopy I did the unthinkable: I drank a Coke. Full caffeine, 12 ounces. And it was heaven. Since I found out I was pregnant at the beginning of September, I cut out caffeine completely. And I was a caffeine junkie. A couple sips into this can of Coke I bought at a 7-11 at 7:30am on my way to work and I knew I had found my cure. The headache dissolved instantly. I no longer felt woozy or shaky. I have no idea if the problem is caffeine withdrawal, low blood sugar, in my head (literally) or what...but I'll be asking my doctor about it next time I see her.
The hybrid-ness...? The nausea. The gagging I have mentioned time and again. But now? It is just awful. Sometimes I will cough and completely go into a dry-heaving fit until I can take a sip of water or a deep breath. And though I had an appetite and continue to for the most part, I will start eating and a few bites in I will feel full. I told Josh the other day, there is no way I am eating the proper amount of calories everyday. Which I think is causing me to feel nauseous and ucky by the time it is time to eat a proper meal. For example, I will wake up in the morning and drink a tiny glass of OJ (I never pour a full glass because I know I won't drink it), then I will maybe eat something small mid-morning like a string cheese or an applesauce. By lunchtime I am ravenous and starting to plot what to eat so I will go make some soup or pick up a chicken sandwich on my way to work. But then, 3 bites in and I am over it. So I don't eat anymore. By 3pm I have eaten about 500 calories...maybe. Then dinner comes and I will cook something or stop to pick up something (working til 7:15 sucks for cooking dinner all the time). I force myself to eat dinner and then feel horrible the rest of the night. So that's a full day with maybe 1500 calories. That's not enough for me...let alone peanut. I need to start doing better about this. Right now, I am typing with a bag of Cheese Its and a bottle of water...the only two things that I could think about putting in my mouth without puking. And I am still force feeding them to myself.
It sucks to feel hungry but at the same time feel like not eating at all. :(